Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
