so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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