i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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