So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize
