part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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