Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
