Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
My butt remains clenched, sir.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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