Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
