just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
