Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
