The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
