I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
