I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
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