the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
