I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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