this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
