He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
