East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
