Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
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