and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize