I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Randomize
