I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
