Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize
