It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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