A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
