I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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