At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
