Where did you get a picture of my penis
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize