this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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