I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
this is an emotional support booty call
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
