So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
