no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
