I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
