Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
