I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize