You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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