So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
