We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Randomize
