You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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