I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
