Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
