Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(419): View more from Ohio

It'd be like medium rare by now.

(1-419): View more from Ohio

I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?

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(806): View more from Texas

We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.

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(971): View more from Oregon

Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?

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(360): View more from Washington

thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter

(323): View more from California

yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake

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(440): View more from Ohio

so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.

(1-440): View more from Ohio

Those bitches did NOT have my back.

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(281): View more from Texas

So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?

(713): View more from Texas

Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?

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