Midget sex pt 2 tonight
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Randomize
