that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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