Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
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