no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
