All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
