I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
