no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
40s are totally the cure
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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