Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
