is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
